PhD's Notes

Maybe the way of my thinking is just match with Japanese society thinking or other developing country.

As a person with Indonesian blood, there is always an urge from my hometown to getting married. One of the reason is because people in my age is already getting married.

But they forgot several things, yes, my blood is Indonesian. But it doesn’t mean that I am going to spend the rest of my life in that country. Where they projected my life, where I am gonna live in the future, how much tax I paid, what is the minimum income should I have to make my children live and study comfortably, most of them is not aware. They just look the work based on their standard.

They kid get stunting, they have to taking a loan, they have to ask their parents to feed their family. They dont think up to that calculation. Some of them, may be feel pity with me just because I am just not legalized my relationship on the paper. But they forgot to look at their self. How is their family condition, is their husband cheating, or can they live freely. instead try to look what other people don’t have but they have, then tried to insult those particular people to make them happy.

Moving to the marriage life need a careful calculation. I dont want to marry for more than once neither I dont want to make my children miserable because their parents is poor.

In fact, buy current income, my money is far from enough to feed my family.

I believe to get married, we need to finish our own business then be ready to share the rest of our life to our significant others. Because married is just not about a freedom to having sex, but a responsibility to create a future and having a better life.

You can read from Quora, almost everyday we gonna read a story about couples who finally divorce, cheating, etc etc when they get marry in such a young age. So rare *if I could not say never, to read a story in QUORA that they have a good married life. Either the problem come from their partner, or come from their parents in law, or come from their economic situation.

If single life is this wonderful, needed a big reason to move to the new challenge called marriage life.